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The best way to approach this situation with understanding and care is to take a page out of the personal experiences of widows and widowers who explain what they valued at the time: Jedi Soth: “Offer understanding and a willingness to listen and (if necessary) distance for the widow/widower to cope with unresolved issues on their own terms if they choose to go it alone.” Sparkles56: “The best advice I have here is to ask the widowed person, ‘How can I be there for you?’ Realize that at some points the widowed person might need space, and don’t take that personally.Also, if the person was terminally ill and that illness took a long time to run its course, the widowed person may have done a lot of grieving prior to the actual occurrence of death and might be ready to date earlier than ‘the experts’ predict.For me, it was 18 months before I considered dating again.If the photos can’t come down, or the reminiscing is constant and weepy, more time is needed.Most widow(er)s have a support system of friends and family.
I would have been dating again within a year if I had not been in a car accident that put me out of action for nine months.
The widow(er) will make this decision for themselves, but the important thing is that you are about to discuss, respect and be comfortable with the amount of time they’ll—or you’ll—need.
Here, a few eharmony users share their personal experience with dating again: Annother: “Everyone is different.
Some are ready to date again shortly after their partner dies. You must set your own timeline, or when building a relationship with a widow or widower, giving them space to become comfortable.
Applying pressure on someone else or on yourself won’t help make widow dating or widower dating easier, but giving yourself space to breathe, process and prepare will.
If you search for ‘widow dating’ or ‘widower dating’—you’ll find a plethora of stories and solutions to ‘getting back out there again.’ While it means well—and is likely, solid information—sometimes, the most important person to ask is, well, yourself.