Benefits dating ugly guy knoxville dating services
He was defiantly confident and self-assured in a way that now seems rooted more in overcompensation.Beyond the physical, Simon was repulsive in other ways.He slightly lifted his leg and farted on our second date with a well-timed cough that he must have thought would cover it up (it didn’t).He was hard of hearing, though he wouldn’t admit it, and he talked exceptionally loud.My husband, unlike all the men I’d dated before him, was handsome.
Where the truth comes out and it’s not the slightest bit pretty, or inspirational, or even positive. It’s also a truth I have kept to myself because of its ugliness. Convinced the person telling me that HAD to be mistaken. If I choose to let in the darkness and the sadness and the REALNESS…won’t I sink in it? I think I’m starting to come to a better understanding of why…but for the moment, it’s still just shadowed and blurry truth that I’m struggling to make sense of. A few years ago I felt like I could simply walk into a room and command the attention of the men in the room. I suspect it was more an internal change than an external one, as I honestly think I physically look better now than I did ten years ago.Since I worried my husband would use my “affair” against me in the divorce proceedings, Simon and I stayed in or went only to certain parts of town.Because we went out so little, I didn’t have to see the looks or maybe I wasn’t very aware of them until the chinks in our relationship were already starting to show through.What led to me filing for divorce had soured me to handsome men, to any man who might resemble a politician. Eighteen years my senior, Simon was tanning-bed tan and bald.He wore glasses with those transition lenses that took too long to lose their tint, and he always had visible nose hair, which he’d try to tuck back into his nostrils instead of just plucking.